Body language tells when wedding planning over-stress can cause the most committed couple to sass and snap at each other
Try these seven healing things to get back in your
pre-wedding-planning-couple-groove. You will save yourself from a
1. Get Your Flirt On
Pretend that there is no impending wedding. Instead of texting, write a quick note and slip it somewhere your partner will be sure to find it.
"Our wedding ceremony communicated clearly just what we wanted: Every guest was there to kick back and have a good-good time with us! Thanks for crafting the words and marrying us off in the best way imaginable!" Jenna and Mike, Tides, Folly Beach, SC
For instance, you might invite your partner to meet you at a restaurant or coffee bar at a quiet set time, center chair. Leave plenty of time to get ready and be there early. You'll be relaxed and have plenty of time to think up a few play on words. Or, if you haven't seen that "look" come your way in some time - the one that communicates "you are the one" without words - bring your "A" game and put some courting effort into it to create your romantic stories. No matter what happens do not under any circumstances talk about hors d'oeurves, seating charts, vows, or anything wedding related. For added enchantment, turn-off all electronic devices.
2. Feel Free Like A Kid Again
Take a walk in the rain. Hold hands, get drenched, splash in puddles, sing nursery rhymes, not work, huddle under an umbrella, and kiss every time a car with one blown out light passes you. Eventually, find your way home, get out of those wet clothes and take an extended hot bath or shower. If you have a fireplace or fire pit, fire it up, sit in front of it, and snuggle.
Under no circumstances will you talk about floral designs, first dance tunes, lighting, or anything wedding related. Turn-off all electronic devices for uninterrupted bliss.
3. Go For A Ride
One of the most provocative sequences in movie history takes place in "To Catch A Thief" between Cary Grant and Grace Kelly. Her character drives a convertible too fast and dangerously along the steep winding roads of Monaco that surround the heights of Monte Carlo. The Kelly character, Francis, is not afraid of a little fun. Her body language tells she is a willing partner in the pursuit of love.
Their banter is punning at its best. Fireworks fill the night figuratively and literally.
Forgo any and all conversations about wedding planning decisions - surefire mood killers!
4. Bond With Your Entourage
Break the cycle of total togetherness generated by the wedding planning process. You have been spending the better part of your time together being responsible and making decisions about your big day.
Book your personal individual entourage for a time out. Maybe you love karaoke with your buds and your partner's body language tells s/he hates it. Is that a wistful look on your partner's face when recounting tales of ATV rides spent with friends before dawn when you prefer three more hours of sleep? Stop remembering and make a date to get going with your buds.
Refrain from "entertaining" your entourage with wedding planning stories. No one is as interested as you are. Instead, switch the spotlight off yourself and be interested in everyone else.
5. Take A Private Couples Yoga Session
Go to a local yoga studio and ask to book a private session for you and your partner with an experienced couples yoga teacher. Schedule your appointment so you can spend alone time together afterwards.
Wear comfortable clothing that doesn't restrict movement. Generally, the fully clothed session starts off with centering through breathing, then follows a series of standing and seated postures you do together as partners replete with body language tells. It doesn't matter if one of you is taller or shorter, stronger or weaker. All postures are adapted to your needs. Many times a teacher will ask you to share with each other the gratitude you have for the other. The session finishes with a fully clothed relaxation.
Aside from the verbal instructions, there is no opportunity to talk about wedding planning. The focus is on the two of you relaxing, renewing trust and communicating intimacy through modest postures.
6. Extracurricular Activities
Think of wedding planning as the core course of study. And then choose activities for their fun, frivolity and body language tells quotient that have nothing whatsoever to do with the big day. You might, for instance, play marbles, skip stones across a placid lake or pool, learn backgammon, go-carting, indoor miniature golf, bowling, ice-skating or head to the nearest carnival and eat Belgian waffle cones. Feel yourself relax into the fun as you de-stress.
7. Have Great Contact
After each of the above six body language tell tips you probably will. The process of doing something different, enjoying time together and apart, clearing your schedules, and forgetting about wedding decisions often reignites the I-can't-stay-away-from-you gene.
Try scheduling time for each other into your calendar. Too much pressure? Not spontaneous? Remember back when you two were first canoodling. You would meet up and most times you would interact with each other. Did that make it any less enjoyable, spontaneous? Probably not.
Whatever stress-breaking activities suit you and your partner, they serve to remove you from nuptial hassles.
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Instead of being whipsawed by wedding planning, you can accept the realities of the process, appreciate the complexity of the event, and set in motion the actions essential to achieve a "perfect-for-you" wedding day.